The title is a quote from the very awesome movie I saw today - Youth in Revolt =]
I saw it with Lauren, a good friend of mine, and it was excellent. Not only was I laughing the entire time, but it made me feel warm and fuzzy inside - the nerd got the girl!
Anyways, I got my audition script + song as of yesterday, and auditions are at the end of the month. I'm going to keep the mentality of the entire situation as light-hearted as possible, so that I don't get too nervous. I'm not really expecting to be granted a part, but I am planning to do my best anyways. When you go into it without expectations, then it's easier to concentrate on the fun of performance. Plus, it's good practice. =]
The expectations people sometimes put upon themselves are often so ridiculous, it's a wonder they don't drive themselves mad (actually, some people do). The focus on succeeding is so strong, that the benefits of failing are completely overlooked. I'm not saying that failing at achieving your goals is a positive thing, in any way. But live and learn, right? The lessons you accumulate when you make mistakes are often worth more than what you learn when you succeed. So, why do we put so much pressure on ourselves?
I can see the tension among the members of our cast, sinking in deeper as we get closer to audition week. It's sad to think that we will lose so many of them once the cast list goes up. Perhaps I shouldn't be allowed to judge. I've simply never been in the "win or go home" frame of mind, myself. There are so many people who would give their right arm to be a part of a cast the way we are, and put on a show the way we do. And yet, so many of these actors will walk away once their egos have been bruised, when they don't land the part they wanted. I'm sorry if I sound too harsh - I guess I can't get my head around it.
I completely understand what it's like to have your heart set on something. The prospect of a lead role is exciting - fully immersing yourself in a character that will be the center of attention for roughly two hours, in front of hundreds of people, on a stage set up specifically for your use. What part of that isn't longed for by every aspiring actor out there?
And when you don't get the part? When someone has judged your performance, your voice, your actions, your appearance - and they don't cast you? It can be a major blow to a persons' self-esteem.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, I understand where these people are coming from - but I still believe that the results of auditions are completely in your own control, depending on your frame of mind. Which brings me back to why I'm going to keep these auditions in perspective, and not but too much pressure on myself. In the end, it's not something to get upset over. A show is a creation of many people working together, and being a part of the end product is your own choice.
Alright, that's enough of my actor-babble. On a side note, I've finally made some progress on my room - the cleanliness level has now gone from "post-battle zone" to "minor earthquake aftermath". Also, I'm going to a yoga class tomorrow morning, which will be lovely. Starbucks 3 times in one week can't possibly be a healthy thing, so an extra workout is exactly what I need.
Honorable Mention: Yesterday was Elvis's 75th birthday. Just saying.
Since I'm feeling quite loving today, I have a challenge for anyone who reads this (which probably won't be many, but I'll give it a shot). The challenge is, for tomorrow: to smile at every single person you pass. Not only will it brighten the day of a stranger, but it will boost your mood a bit, as well.
I'm off. Peace and love, all.
- Karebear
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